Sunday, May 13, 2012

READ THIS FIRST. You have been warned...

This is an unbloggable blog.

The reason why it is unbloggable is because my family have the internet and would not be overly thrilled at finding out about the sometimes scandalous shennanigans I get up to. "Oh, Zabinsky," they shall say to me, voices thick with reproach, "what has become of you? You used to be so sensible. Get down on your knees and repent of your Godless ways."
"But -" I shall stutter, desperately trying to dispel the disapproving glares of my parents and grandparents, "Other people get up to way worse stuff than what I do! I'm still so very sweet and naive. Things that are normal for most people I consider to be wild and unfamiliar experiences. I'm - I'm a nice girl! I don't smoke or take drugs or get very drunk or do any of that sort of crap -"
Their faces will contort into winces of horror. "Don't swear, Zabinsky," they will cry, and I will seethingly subside into silence as they begin to pray for the salvation of my soul.

This is a situation I would very much like to avoid. Hopefully, my family will never discover the depths of depravity to which I have sunk. The most obvious avoidance method is to never speak about it, ever. Writing about it on my blog is definitely off-limits.

And yet...

Some of my hooliganisms are, while shocking, too funny to not share. Which is why I have created this new, completely annonymous blog. No person or place will be explicitly referred to. In it will be tales of my slow decent into debauchery. If you are reading this, it is because you are a friend I trust enough to tell you about it.

I hope you enjoy my stories. You already know how ridiculous things tend to happen to me. This is more of the same - only a bit more scandalous.

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